Saturday, December 23, 2006

Dreaming that She is You.

NOTE; some of you know that I have other blogs. One of them is Visible Origami and is about metaphysical things as opposed to the socio-political that this blog expresses. Many of you most likely don't go over there. As it is Christmas I thought I would depart from the usual fare and make this exception in topic just this once. This is reposted from Visible Origami. I hope you don't mind. The best of the essence of the season to you all.

Dreaming that She is You.

I have the most intense dreams. Sometimes they are as real as if I were right there like I am right here. Last night I changed into a young woman; late teens, early twenties... pretty, which I was aware of but not as much as I might have expected; not that I had much of an idea of what to expect. There wasn’t anything sexual about the dream. Inversely I was also attracted to the women in the environment more than the men but, as I said, there wasn’t anything sexual about the dream.

I was living in London in a community where people came and went. Suddenly I/she was in it and Apollonius, the mask layer of Les, the mask layer of the observer was gone. I was briefly touched when people asked about him but I couldn’t tell them anything. The biggest difference was in the way people looked at me. I had an instinctive wariness that was similar to something I have had most of my life. I realized it was this female thing I had either always had or developed as a result of the fighting arts and kundalini experiences.

A woman and her boyfriend came to the door of the restaurant that was a part of the community I lived in and I was talking to them about what we were like. The woman was one of those big horsy English ladies and she wanted to go somewhere else. It was as they were leaving that I noticed that it was because of me. She was threatened by my elfin appearance, even though her boyfriend was just hungry and hadn’t taken any particular exception to my appearance. There were a lot of little nuances of this sort. The most interesting feature was that being female wasn’t exactly the way you picture it if you are a man. There’s a non-sexual aspect to the whole thing that seems to transmit itself in a sexual seeming way that isn’t exactly that. It’s more like the difference between magnetism and electricity.

When I got up this morning I felt this sense of intense well being. I have to say that that is often the case. Still, this morning it was larger than usual and, as usual, was encompassed by this female energy that is a lot like waking up in bed with your mother when you are still in pre-pubescent status; the sensation follows me out of the bedroom and into my study where I sit each morning with my tea and tobacco and have my morning conversation with God. For me God is a mother and ever more so as time passes. It’s an interesting period of time. We talk and she tells me things and sometimes I will make these deep noises in my throat that vibrate in my ribcage and have something to do with harmonizing me with the levels beneath the phenomenal world.

Early in the 20th Century the cosmic clock moved into the sign of Aquarius. There is a lot of complexity in this and it needn’t be addressed here. One of the larger changes that this sign brings is the feminization of the masculine. You see it in the emergence of Goddess worship and the Gaia principle and you see it in the wider proliferation of bi-sexuality and gay lifestyle. It is essentially geared toward the intuitive nature. However, in the material world it can take on all sorts of expressions. On the grosser level, materialism is one of the perversions of the feminine. It’s funny that the impetus for comfort is civilization’s reaction to pain. Well, it isn’t funny. It creates pain aplenty of its own and worse, it creates despair and existential emptiness.

I find religions to be a great curiosity. You learn a lot about people by watching the way they dress the unknown. Most of the time it seems as if they are making a larger version of themselves, complete with all of the fears and prejudices that they possess in the smaller version. They are certain that God will smite their enemies and that God knows who that is and that the heathen are going to Hell. Another curiosity is that God is up in the sky somewhere. That doesn’t make a lot of sense if you are a metaphysician or a mystic but if you’re in the usual dualized (my word) confusion it makes a kind of unfortunate sense to see God as something you are not and never will be; even if both areas of physics tell you that the thing is a whole. Well, the child and the mother appear to be separate things but they’re not. It’s the way things look as opposed to the way things are that screw us up.

People talk about going to Heaven and seeing their loved ones who have passed on. No one is going Heaven who isn’t already there. The time to get to Heaven is while you are still in this body. Of course, depending on how you handle things here, Heaven might come looking for you or it might not. It depends on whether you are looking for it. A lot of people think that Heaven is something like Las Vegas and that is the appeal of Las Vegas. Or it could be L.A. or a lot of other places. Heaven is a land of impersonality. The ticket in is something you leave, not something you bring. The loss of this thing is the automatic keyed entry.

Just about everyone has a domestic argument going on in their head. Their mother and father are having a fight at the dinner table in their mind or in the living room while they lie in bed reaching for sleep. Regardless of what you understand about that limited perversion called psychology, or about anything regarding the seeming dual nature of things, there is only one objective and that is to bring your parents together in your mind and heart and make them one. Indeed, it is about the heart swallowing the mind. It’s called the Alchemical Marriage. It’s the objective of Tantra. It’s what Christ meant about grooms and bridegrooms. It’s union really. It’s more than coincidental that the letters for the words, 'unity', 'love' and 'death' in a certain mystical science all add to 13; but another time for that.

If you go looking for connections (and I suggest that you do) you find that two poles always create a third that postulates another and on and on. Whatever you were disappears by degrees as you follow along, no matter which direction you go in. It all comes back to the same place. Outward toward the light and noise or inward toward the quiet and the light; they touch. The jury is out on which one hurts more. And most of us need for the jury to be out in the hope that going out actually will prove to have been smarter. Well, your mother has to let you go. She knows what’s waiting out there but you don’t. It’s that love that allows for all that you have to suffer that lets you go because she also knows that you can’t miss finding her no matter how lost you get or how long it takes to find her again. It's not like you can't find her at any point along the way.

In materialism, which is very pronounced at this time, she can be turned into a dark goddess with a bloody aspect. We all heard when we were young how certain things were for our own good. It’s a hard irony to learn that the creator and the destroyer are one.

Every Christmas it happens to me. Sometimes it comes late and sometimes it comes early. I never bother with presents or cards. A fine table and the human joy of company does me and mine better than any trifle could. We prefer to give ‘presence’ instead. All year long we can do for one another and hopefully for those who cross our paths as well. But every Christmas the day comes when I wake up feeling too good to define and this joy just starts to wash over everything and I know it is because I feel gratitude and gratitude is the highest form of giving.

Gratitude is recognition of the inexplicable gift and automatically causes you to give yourself away. Nothing more is needed and it is the key to Heaven as well. Opening the door to Heaven is not about walking into anything but about having Heaven flow through the door into you and beyond. Yes... and that just results in more gratitude and more gratitude exponentially... just so.

The shoving desperation in the aisles and the clamoring for attention... the demands and insistence upon service and a speedy exit; the terrible violence of the marketplace rape of the uniformed heart... well... to each their own. You wrap the plastic and shiny things in colored paper and you say, “This is for you. It’s because I didn’t know how to give you myself.”

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Yeah, it Feels Just Like Vietnam All Over Again.

You get the feeling we’ve been here before? Oh, some of the personnel are different, but some of them are the same. Some of them are a lot more inarticulate and incompetent but that’s how far we’ve come in a few decades. One should never under estimate the impact of progress even if it’s in the wrong direction.

Yeahh..... ummm... hmmm... Smell that? Smells just like Vietnam doesn’t it? Weren’t they fighting for democracy over there too? Ostensibly I mean. What’s the word for ‘gook’? Is it ‘towel-head?’, ‘camel fucker’? How do you say, “I give you long time G.I.” in Arabic?

You see, according to The Emperor Chimp, the result of the recent election was not to pull out of Iraq, it was to find new ways to win. It begs the question of why the old ways didn’t win and brings up the ugly fact that no way won in Vietnam; except of course we didn’t stay the course.

Yes, it’s escalation time. It’s also time to “meet the new boss, same as the old boss.” The three card monte boys have set up shop around the corner and it’s a new and improved game. It’s the ‘same thing only different’. You got to love it. The only difference between the movies that were and the movies that will be is that in real time Kurtz was/is in the White House. Think of the ironies if they send Martin Sheen after him now.

Come January, the trained seals will be honking and flapping their flippers, balancing colored balls on their noses and pushing their stomachs in shopping carts right into the main Wal-mart store on Capitol Hill.

Of course there won’t be any real impact until 2008 and they could get a handful of thousands over there in the short term and then the attacks would go up and nothing would change except that things would get worse. Rahm Emanuel did his best to funnel the campaign money to war supporters and he’s hoping that will help when it comes to public perceptions of how important it is that we get victory with honor out of this no win situation.

Meanwhile there’s the big time international conversion of oil money from dollars to petro-Euro and the pending housing crash as well as the indications of runaway inflation... and... what I want to know is; who does central casting have in mind to play Jimmy Carter?

Most of the American public and a much larger percentage of the rest of the world KNOW that the American neo-cons, the administration of the cigar store Indian president and assorted thugniks and sundry interests were behind 9/11, so the war isn’t about what the war is about any way. A large amount of the public the world over knows that this war and the pending Iranian assault are the result of Israel’s control of American foreign policy. Nothing is what it is presented as, the same as Vietnam.

You got to feel for the American people. They turned out to vote in such vast numbers that not even Diebold could make a difference and now they’re gripping the cell bars again with their pants around their ankles and not a tube of KY in sight. Well, they’re used to it.

Hey, anybody seen George P. Bush? He was making news for awhile and now he’s just plumb dropped out of view. You know George P. would look right smart in a helmet and fatigues and... talk about a photo-op career move. Somebody ought to get a big banner printed up and photo-shop that sucker above his head on the QE2. The banner could say “Mission Bypassed” or something... “Mission Not Attempted”? You know what to do.

Somebody ought to get some yearbook photos of all those smiling sons and daughters of American politicians and make them known for their sacrifice in this demanding hour. I realize that Israel is pretty tied up with their land-grab genocide in Gaza but they too ought to do a little more than just blackmail Congress and yoke rob the media. After all, this is their war.

Has anybody noticed how much Donald Rumsfield looks like Robert McNamara? I just thought I’d throw that in.

The never ending war for never ending reasons; you got to love it. Bodies bursting in air, the sand reeling drunk with blood; it’s a good thing it’s already laying on the ground because it could hardly get up.

Oh, there are some differences between Vietnam and Iraq. The terrain and the languages and a few other things but the blood’s still red and the pain is the same. Of course no one has figured out a way to make an omelet without breaking legs so I guess we just need to stay the course but we’re going to call it something different.

Oh the ironies, the ironies... chicken-hawks who wouldn’t fight and who profit from the deaths of those too callow to see the face of the real enemy still send others to die for their bank accounts. Wars are still manufactured for lies and swag. It’s a video game isn’t it?

Why don’t they just kill the people who start these wars? That’s the thing I don’t get. Shouldn’t there be some kind of constitutional amendment that says when a demagogue and a bunch of business interests get together that they should be put up against a wall and shot? Doesn’t that make perfect sense? I realize that the people in the wings won’t make as much from the pay per view sales but the outlay is so much less and... wait a minute... oh yeah, they make the guns and the bombs and the uniforms and the body armor and the pharmaceuticals and on and on and on. Stupid me.

That’s how it is down here. It’s about controlling the markets. Everything that follows is collateral damage and that’s easily amortized. By now that portion of us with a brain remaining know who is behind all of this. It’s uncanny isn’t it? Out of that whole Congress, where are the men and women standing up and crying, “Hold, enough!”? Where are the powerful voices of the powerful ringing out across the airwaves? You telling me all we got are the Dixie Chicks? Do you mean to tell me we have got to listen to Michael Kingsley Lite and Noam ‘wrong way’ Chomsky parse reality into bite sized canapés for our collective consumption? Where did all these watered down genuflecting piss ants come from? Where is the grass roots surge so great that it will topple this mountain of snakes into the angry sea? What’s up in condo-land? What is that horrific sense of despair that wanders like the wraith from The Frighteners along the shopping lanes of Mall-World in this festive hour?

Yeah, it’s like Vietnam but it’s not too. It’s a little worse and a little uglier because of what’s on the blueprints. You can’t see it in the framing or the concrete pour. We haven’t gotten to the fascia yet. I’m hoping Santa has a great big bag of coal for this Christmas Eve. I’m watching and I know how it ends because I’ve seen it before. It always ends the same way. The one thing you can count on is how quick the makeover happens for the ones who got away and took the plastic surgeons with them when they went.

Thursday, December 7, 2006

Trouble in the Ivory Tower

I am honored to be a member of 9/11 Scholars for Truth, although I didn’t know I was a member until I got a letter informing me of trouble in The Ivory Tower and asking me to vote on the future of the movement. Before I get into what details I am aware of let me set a little background and stage some scenery for the points I want to make. I consider these points critical and I want them understood; not defeated by a lack of presentation or my own limitations.

For a long time I considered this site the definitive 9/11 Truth site. I have great respect for a number of the members and I appreciated their approach which was based on science and reason. There are some things wrong with the 9/11 Truth movement. Some of these things are the result of faulty reasoning and wild speculation that are often the grounds on which rational thinkers reject what they might otherwise thoughtfully consider. It’s what gets some people and groups the sobriquet of ‘tinfoil hats’ and ‘wild eyed conspiracy nuts’. The other thing wrong is the disinfo specialists. These are organizations like The US Government, organized religion and their sycophants, Main Stream Media, e.g. Popular Mechanics magazine and their talking heads, alleged experts and catamite journalists. On the one side are those who don’t know what they’re talking about and on the other side are those who may or may not know what they are talking about but are more than comfortable with lying for a position or paycheck.

9/11 Scholars for Truth has a remarkable membership of serious and distinguished academics, artists, former government officials and international figures. You may argue with their findings but you would need powerful front credentials and a dump-truck load of obfuscating bullshit to do it. You cannot argue with their education, experience and credibility. Of course, you could but minds capable of objective reasoning would wonder about this.

There is a third problem that attacks the credibility of any movement and that is ‘personalities on the make’, individuals who are using a platform of public interest as a springboard to the increase of their own celebrity. This is the major feature that kept me from being involved in certain Pro-Peace and anti-War movements. This is what keeps me and others with a sense of personal dignity from joining organizations whose purpose we might sympathize with but whose figureheads we hold in contempt. The issue of concern should always triumph over the ambitions of the barnacles, lampreys and ticks who attach themselves to the body of our best interests. We see this phenomenon in many areas of endeavor and the reform movements whose purpose is to transform these arenas.

It is contemptible that ill made personalities would engage in such antics. They do terrible harm, witness Ralph Nader and the 2000 election. These men and women put their career ambitions ahead of the public good and they kill our faith and they stall our desire to join in the effort to make this world a better place. Whether this is possible I leave to your capacity to believe and imagine... but I submit we should never stop trying. Let me offer my respect and admiration for all of you who have put your principles before the advancement of your personality. There are fewer of you than there should be but the impact of what you do upon the culture and the lives of your fellows cannot be overestimated.

Lately 9/11 Scholars for Truth has been exhibiting some bizarre behavior. We see discussion of theories such as the use of ‘high tech energy weapons’ and the idea that no planes were used in the attacks. Perhaps the first occurred, I don’t know but the latter is absurd... and though anything is possible, promoting this angle is harmful to the 9/11 Truth movement. It’s the kind of thing that makes you wonder just as the absurdity of the government's explanation makes you wonder.

These are ideas that Professor James Fetzer is advancing and he is doing other things as well. I am printing the letter I received as a member at the end of this article. Nowhere in the letter am I told that this is a privileged communication. I feel therefore that I can make it public since it was placed in my hands without a disclaimer. Secondly, we are about truth, therefore let the truth be known. If I have offended 9/11 Scholars for Truth and if this means I can no longer be a member so be it. Whatever details I might have included here can be found in this letter at the end of the article so let me use the rest of the space for my perspective on the matter.

I happen to admire a lot of what Professor Fetzer has done and appreciate his hard work and courage. I equally admire the co-founder, Dr. Steven Jones and many of the membership with whose work I am familiar. I cannot judge whether Professor Fetzer has gone off the rails but something is wrong and it is hurting ‘our’ efforts and it’s got to be fixed. Before we police the world we had damn well better police ourselves. The possibility that so many prestigious scholars might be compromised by juvenile ambitions and wooly thinking is offensive to me. This is just the sort of weapon that the enemies of truth lust after. It is potentially as devastating as whatever brought down the WTC.

We need to come together as one voice and we need to pressure Congress to empanel members from this distinguished community of scholars to present their findings in a public forum. If the new leaders of Congress refuse to do this; stonewall, delay, dance out of range or utilize any of the tactics of procrastination and attenuation then we may rightly assume that they are bought off by the same forces that brought the towers down.

There is no reason why such a large collection of eminent scholars and researchers should not be allowed their place in the debate that so far has never taken place. Let’s set the facts of what was observed to happen on the table and then let ‘both sides’ argue their findings before the court of public opinion. Let the chips fall where they may. Let the public hear both arguments as to how and why the buildings came down. Surely the evidence of one side or the other will prevail. Let us see what that may be. Is this not how it should be in a democratic society? Are we not always hearing about the public’s right to know?

Citizens of America demand your right to know. Members of the 9/11 Scholars for Truth, let’s get ourselves together. Let’s sort this out. What 9/11 Scholars for Truth should be engaged in is getting sympathetic members of Congress to open hearings into this sad, stinking mess. It is less important to be pushing theories and arguments than it is to bring the argument to center stage. This is the important thing. Congress MUST act. Our sole purpose should be to get them to act. We can present all of our arguments then. Sooner or later it must come to this. Therefore, the sooner the better. Let’s make it happen or I will begin to suspect everyone and I would rather not.

Here is the body of the letter I received. The links are inactive but if you are of a mind you can trace them. I have removed the return email for voting, that seems appropriate.

“Dear members of Scholars for 9/11 Truth:

Thank you for your commitment to the truth, and your willingness to participate in this journey for truth and justice relating to the events of 9/11.

A scholars group was founded on the initiative of Prof. Marcus Ford, who sent out a call via asking if there were other academics who questioned the official 911 story. About 30 responded and became the nucleus. In emails amongst the group, Prof. Jim Fetzer suggested a formal organization with himself and Prof. Steven Jones as co-chairs. The society was organized with two co-chairs, with no president or by-laws or treasury, and it was understood that the group would be a member-owned organization. Steven Jones, Alex Floum and Carl Weis formed a steering committee along with Jim Fetzer. Carl created the logos. Alex pushed the creation of a website, purchased the domain names for the website, and has at all times hosted the website. It was understood that this was done for the group, not for an individual. The original goals of the group were to use the scientific method to investigate the evidence and "let the chips fall where they may".

Since the group was formed, we have launched a website (, created a peer-reviewed online journal ( and a private moderated discussion forum for the participation of all members. We have made inroads in the mainstream media and have helped to "move the ball down field" for 9/11 Truth.

Problems have now arisen with the management of the website, currently in the hands of Prof. Jim Fetzer. Many members have pointed out that some of the material displayed there is no longer in accord with our original aims, and personal attacks on members have appeared. Positions are being promoted which are disputed by the scientists specializing in physical sciences from Scholars For 9/11 Truth.

Attempts to correct this situation have failed. As of this date the web site continues to promote assertions which many of us consider to be both discrediting and unsupported by the evidence (ray-beams from space caused the demolitions, mini-nukes were used in the WTC towers, real commercial jets did not hit the WTC towers, etc.). We feel that the promotion of these ideas functions to distract from and discredit much of the other basic strong material challenging the official story of 9/11 which already exists - the stand down, the war games, the insider trading, the many strong points of evidence on the demolitions, etc.

While we would rather focus on 9/11 research and activism, and do not lightly bother the members with this matter, the "dirty laundry" and non-scientific theories raised by Jim Fetzer are now very public. For example, one of the largest papers in the Twin Cities has covered this -- -- and a well-read blog says "scholars for 9/11 Truth [are] tearing one another new impact holes over speculation on space-based beam weaponry", see In addition, the website now prominently displays a letter titled "Scholars: On Its First Anniversary" which contains inaccurate statements and ad hominen attacks. All of the momentum and progress made by the Scholars is rapidly being destroyed by the current situation. Many of the members strenuously dispute the accuracy of Jim's statements as quoted in these articles, and can provide detailed refutations. These statements are damaging the credibility of the group and, we are concerned, the entire 9/11 truth movement.

Moreover, Jim is using the website as his personal blog, posting non-9/11 related political commentary from a liberal perspective. While there is nothing wrong with a liberal or conservative perspective, we believe the site should be non-partisan.

The current scholars website & group will shortly become two websites & groups. The hope is that both efforts will contribute to the goals of achieving an end to 9/11 cover-ups and wars, that members of both groups will conduct themselves with civility and common sense and have fidelity to the scientific method and its results.

Group Structure 1: This group is proposed to have an elected steering committee in charge of the website and its contents. Administrative positions will be limited to one year. Important decisions affecting the whole group will be submitted via email to the membership.

This proposal emerged from discussions on the Scholars for 9/11 Truth Forum as a means to return the web site to the guiding principles of applying the scientific method, performing experiments and analyses, and publishing results and findings with civility. While novel theories would be welcome, and openly discussed, only theories well supported by evidence would be promoted.

A new website is being created which will be attached to the peer-reviewed Journal of 9/11 Studies. (Click to see the beginnings of this new site, and to see the Journal contents, and its advisory board.)

This proposal is backed by all of the members of the ad hoc committee as well as an overwhelming majority of members participating in a straw poll on the group's forum.

Group Structure 2: Jim Fetzer has proposed an alternative structure for the existing website ( In this proposal he would appoint a board which would have control of the website and could appoint members and webmaster by 2/3rds majority. The board would not be bound by the guiding principles set out above but would be free to establish its own. (Members Kevin Ryan, Steven Jones and others have declined to be part of Jim Fetzer?s proposed re-organization.)

We ask you to select which group structure you would prefer to be registered with. You may also opt for both group structures, or neither.

Whichever group structure receives the majority of member votes [by Dec 6 at 5 pm eastern] may become entitled, but will not be required, to use the name, domain, logo, and all the links which have been attached. Negotiation on this area is proceeding (and Jim Fetzer may be accorded use of the "" site address as a matter of courtesy even if the majority chooses Group 1.)

Membership is closed during the voting period.

To sum up, the two choices before you are:

1. Group Structure 1, with a new website associated with the Journal of 9/11 Studies, run by an elected committee, and stressing theories for which there is strong empirical evidence, OR

2. Group Structure 2, with the website run by Jim Fetzer, and a board that he appoints.

To vote simply "reply" to this email

You may elect to register with "1" or "2" by simply typing the number in the subject line of your reply.

If you wish, you may elect to remove your name from the membership listing entirely at this time by typing "Remove" in the subject line. You may also elect to remain on both websites by typing "Both" in the subject line. Any vote in which the meaning is clear will be accepted no matter how expressed.

Members who do not reply by 5:00 p.m. U.S. Eastern Standard Time on December 7, 2006 will be placed in a pending category on both sites for further consultation.

If there are queries regarding this proposal contact the membership administrator at

Please expect to see an email from Prof. Fetzer shortly outlining the advantages of remaining with his website.”