Dog Poet Transmitting.......
Is it real? Is any of it real? Bombers
in New York? While Kissinger is in Paraguay stabbing kittens with a
fork. Since the inception of these blogs we have always been adamant
about what large charities are all about. They are money
mills for the rich. If you were paying attention to the aftermath
of the Haiti earthquake and if you saw the prominent presence of Bush
the Stupid and Bush the Kennedy Killer and Clinton the Drug Baron and
all those rock stars of which the worst is always Bono, then you know
that generally; meaning nearly all the time, the money never finds
its way to the ones it is supposed to find its way to. We pointed out
over a decade ago here that Hunger Porn is a major, continuously
regenerating, IPO and we pointed out that in Africa, all these
evangelists go into these areas of famine and need and... in their
Banana Republic safari suits they seat these small black children,
with their swollen bellies on their laps after... after having
painted sugar water under their eyes to attract the flies. If you
need more detail about (other things- not the sugar water, I got that
somewhere else) this you can read Paul Theroux's “Dark
Star Safari: Overland from Cairo to Capetown.” Since we are on
this particular subject but... more importantly this particular
writer, be sure to get a copy of “Blinding
Light.” Maybe a lot of people who have thought I was crazy
won't feel the same way afterwards, having read this book.
My life is awash in The Mother these
days. Every time it looks like I will fall, she catches me. It is
uncanny. All my life, I have become accustomed to defeat and even
ignominy but I am still here. What are the odds? What are the odds? I
think back about the alleged
suicide of Hunter Thompson and Danny
Casolaro; of which the obvious is the obvious and I think to
myself, “If they had only had The Mother, they would have been
okay..” Maybe they still are. I don't make the rules. I just abide
by them because the real rules are inviolate. You can't break them
but... they will break you if you do not bend. “Those who do not
bend will break.” The incomparable Lao Tzu is the author of that.
I have my heroes and I suspect you do
too. Long ago when I was just a know nothing punk, like I probably
still am... I got Lao Tzu. I got him so much that I would take
massive amounts of LSD and simply read his words over and over and
over and over and over again; sometimes for the entire day, over and
over and over and over and over again. I couldn't stop myself in
those days. When everyone else was talking about free love and peace
and justice, I was thinking, 'same as it always was, same as it
always was.' Of all the things in this life, I have loved Wisdom more
than anything else and Understanding follows close behind. You can't
have Wisdom without Understanding. They are the twin pillars, just as
in the behavioral sense, it is 'faith, certitude and determination'.
My friends, we have come a long way
with each other. We have walked this road, you and I and we have
found some measure of serenity and tranquility. They are both the
same, my friends. Speaking only for myself, I have found some measure
of peace, regardless of what I am getting put through, I want to take
this opportunity to say that, “I love you... every one of you.” I
know that I have been unbalanced at times. I have been reckless in my
pursuit of the almighty but... in the end, I found the almighty and
that is all that counts... all that counts and all that will ever
count.” We are the sum total of what we have done under the gaze of
invisible eyes. These are, truth be told, like Ozymandias
Under pitiless eyes. Truth be told, we are ourselves measured
against the pitiless eyes of history, as it is recorded through the
propaganda of the victors who, last time I heard about it, are the
ones who write whatever history we hear about; if we are even paying
attention in the first place.
Regardless of all the things I have
done right or wrong in this life, I have ALWAYS sought to do the
right thing. I may not have always known what that right thing was
but I did my best. Before you criticize me, ask yourself... how well
you would have done? How well would you have done???
I need to point out that God is always
watching. God is ALWAYS watching; through your eyes, through your
ear. Every time you taste something. Every time you touch someone,
“like sunlight dancing on your skin.” Through all the things we
have been put through, we are still here and that has to mean
something. It all means something but I don't know what that is.
In this life I have seen so many
things. Half of them went right by me. The other half of them just
mystified me. Sometimes when I dream, I am in ancient Atlantis, or
Lemuria, or all those places that if you measured them against the
relentless march of time, the world has come up wanting
Truth be told. My position now is to
love all of you, as much as I can. I cannot help myself. I actually
care. Give me some credit, I really care. I really do. My friends,
my loving you is not handicapped by an inability to get it ...along
with the status quo. The world we live in is not the world I used to
know. It is a different world now. I am prepared to leave here and am
even considering the route of departure. It will not be like Danny or
Hunter. My friends are too powerful for that and will not permit it
but... reality and truth are such fragile things when you never saw
any portion of them to begin with. Every day I sit on my deck or
drive by in the car and I see people texting or talking on a phone. I
cannot imagine that whatever it is that made the conversation so
important is actually that important that they can't pull over to
make it happen. Sometimes, I think of myself as an action hero who
slams the car into their conveyance just to get their attention;
“honey, could you please hold? I've got someone else on the other
line.” I stand up on the deck and yell at them when they go by on a
bicycle. Obviously I am not sane. My friends here are not sure what
to make of me but since they are laughing I assume it is alright.
Some strange virus is sweeping the
world. I don't know what it is because it has not affected me... yet.
However, I see it every day. I was driving down the road yesterday,
taking a friend to the hospital, she had broken her foot and... maybe
it was coincidence and maybe not ...but every car going by had the
driver texting or on the phone and it was as if it was being
demonstrated for me. I was driving to Camden at that time to the
Cooper Hospital and I saw so many accidents waiting to happen that I
suddenly wished I was back in Europe... no- Europe is out. I thought
of Asia... hmmm. I am planning to go back to India, if I survive this
cross country episode but where... where? Where is there anywhere to
rest in peace; RIP... except for Bhutan? Life on this planet at this
time, it haunts me. I am torn between screaming at the world as it
goes by and trying to embrace everyone who passes me in the street.
It is an agony of confusion.
I know who the bad guys are. I do not
know who the good guys are and... as day follows day, the supposed
good guys are more frequently turning into bad guys, as we have seen
in the last couple of months. More and more, Mr. Apocalypse is
bringing everyone down. If they can't see themselves in the mirror
then the reflection will be blurred and twisted. It is that Jekyll
and Hyde thing. We didn't mean to turn into monsters. It just
happened. It happened because we could no longer see ourselves and
this is what happens in this life. When materialism preempts the
capacity to clearly observe what is happening right in front of your
eyes, it is no longer what it appears to be. It is only what it does
not appear to be. It is as if all the angels that previously lit our
way are now the demons who darken our path. I am just one man in
search of wisdom and understanding and I have not found these things.
I am still looking. I am always looking
I really do love all of you. The emails
that I get are priceless. I have this friend in Australia named Rakib
that I hear from every month and Smyma and so many wonderful people
that make me feel good about myself but... in the end, you make it
possible for me to show up. I am in the worst circumstances I have
ever been in, simply because the world is being set on its ear. My
personal problem is that I feel everything and it doesn't matter who
it is happening to; I feel it. Telepathy is as much a curse as a
blessing. Once long ago, certain powers were delivered to me and I
cast most of them aside because I knew I could not handle it. So... I
have erred on the side of giving a shit and now, we just surf the
dirty waters of a dying age.
Keep the faith my brothers and sisters.
Hang in there. It won't be too long now. Do the best you can.
